My only way to express myself yet again.

It has been a while since my last post. So much have changed over the past two to three years. Recently, I had a quarrel with my girlfriend and this was the first serious quarrel we had in the past two years of our relationship. It has made me realised that I really love her so so much and just the thought of losing was too hard to bear. I have never ever been so serious about a girl before and I am so looking forward to spending the rest of life with her.

Things seem to be looking fairly good even though we had a quarrel, simply because we made up and everything was cleared. But only recently my girlfriend spoke to me about what her family thought about me. The comments made were mostly negative and only some were positive. In that moment, I was quite puzzled because I never knew that they actually felt that way about me. After thinking back, I knew why they felt that way but to me, I felt that whatever things I did was my own interest and I am just being myself. I am really clueless, should I just be the way I am or should I just simply stop doing the things so that I would not be judged.

I really love my girlfriend and I knows she loves me too. But I really don't want to put her in a spot whereby she got to explain to everyone. I know she is really frustrated with her job and I really don't want to add on to her burden. Maybe I should change for her to become the person that her family wants me to be. Hope I am doing the right thing.