Charlie Company = Shag

ARMY

Finally after POP, I thought i would be able to slack ... but i guess i was wrong, cause i am being posted to CHARLIE company which has a very famous reputation in SISPEC. Luckily i have alot of my VIPER mates in my current platoon 3. I believe i will be able to conquer BSLC and move on to the next stage of army life. So I will try and motivate myself to do my best.

RELATIONSHIP

Regarding my relationship, honestly i was unable to put the whole relationship aside. Its simply too hard a thing to do, everytime when i have to think about stuff, i would unknownly think of the past which was filled with happiness and joy. However all these are gone because of the things i've done in the past, I can only live to regret. I realised how important you were in my life and all the sacrifices you have to make just to make me happy. Only until now that you are gone then I realised it, I really don't know if its too late for me to do anything but i just keep on trying. But now that i realised what i have lost, i will do anything it takes to make you trust me again and have the confidence you used to have in me in the past. Many people have told me to give up on you and just move on with my life, but i really cannot do it because i simply need you to be in my life and my heart will always be yours regardless whether you will come back to me or not, cause i really love you too much. I cannot blame it on anybody but myself, blame it on my childishness and stupidity for not being able to see how much you have done for me in the past. Letting you slip away is my biggest regret and i really hope i will have the chance to be with you again. I just can't live without you .. Life has no purpose without you in my heart. I guess thats how F*** up life is, only when you lose something/someone then you will learn to cherish it/her. If i could go back time, i would definetely not treat you the way i used to treat you last time. Nevertheless, no matter what your decision maybe, its your life and your choice, as long as you are happy then i am fine with it. Just give me a call when you want to talk about it, i will be waiting and looking forward to your call. Take Care.. Love YOu

PoP lo !!

The day that i had been looking forward to has finally come, however i was rather reluctant to move on to my next stage of army life. Leaving behind the bond that i have with my platoon and bunk mates. Although everyone was happy to POP but i could tell that everyone has that look on their faces wondering what the next stage would be. Have to start all over again knowing new friends and commanders. One thing that i learnt in army, only when you are willing to step out of your comfort zone and push yourself then you will become a stronger person.

Having my block leave now, but i feel so lonely without her in my life. Everyday just spend time watching anime and chilling at home. So darn boring .... I think i shouldnt be giving her too much pressure and stuff, cause its rather irritating for her i guess. Perhaps i should just let things take its nature course, i really dunno what else i can do except giving her time and more time. This year would be a lonely christmas for me without you, miss all the fun we had for the past 3 years during christmas. Until this day, i have once stop regretting and feeling angry about myself for treating you the way i treated you. I miss you so so much ... my heart will always be yours to keep. Love you !!