Bad Stuff ....

Chapter 5

Today is Monday so here i am, blogging again, as you can observe my blog would only be updated when i am in the office working.

- Problems Surfacing

After a few months being together, i began to hang out more with my friends as i thought that there was mutual trust between us and so i presume that everything would be fine no matter what i do. Then one fine day, my buds asked me to go club with them, as i told them i was very keen in going club and to ask me to go if they were going. And so i went, the experience was just superb, the music, liquor, atmosphere and babes was just so perfect. It was damn fun.... I didnt realise that i was hooked to going club... soon i was asking people to go club except her, as i thought that club was more for friends get together and have fun rather then going there with my gf to dance... find it quite meaningless ... Everytime when i go club i would smoke a few sticks so as to get more kick without much effort so became quite a social smoker. I told her about it and she got really mad and upset, so i told her all right i will quit it for your sake. However, i was tempted time and time again. It was like no matter where i go, i would be able to get hold of cigarettes somehow if i wanted to... At times i would resist it but as time goes by i thought to myself : " Aiya 1 stick nia wont make any difference de la so nvm lo just smoke" ..... I dun understand why but everytime i smoke 1 stick i would surely tell her and she would get all upset and disappointed with me. I explained to her all the stuff but it was like bullshit to her and she just wanted me to stop smoking even if it was just 1 stick. Soon she also showed me the NO sign to go clubbing and stuff, i was really furious as friends plays an important part in my life... i felt like she was restricting me to do anything that i wanted to do, hence i was became very cold towards her as the anger in my heart was raging day by day ...

- Disagreements-->Anger-->Break

And so that unpredictable happened, one day we were in her room having a serious heart to heart talk as we both had our disagreements. Soon we started quarrelling and there seemed no other way to settle the problem as we both held firm to our stand... Then i said :" Since you are so unhappy with me then we might as well break up, perhaps you will be happier without me ...." and then i left the house and went home...

-Work And More Work

As it was during our sem holidays, i was very free so i decided to work. I went back to the hotel that i worked in during my holidays after my O'levels. In order to kill time, i was working like mad, became like a full timer there, and so i just work and work. That was how my life was, just work and work waiting for the new sem to start. I do not deny that i missed her alot at this period of time hence i just kept working to numb myself and stop myself from thinking about her.... I felt like a part of me was missing, felt so lonely and empty within me... Luckily, i had my buds and my working friends to accompany me or else i think i would have gone crazy ....

Wah write so long liaoz ... k la keep some for tomorrow !!

Stay tuned for Chap 6